At Least I’ve Got Good Benefits

2 Apr

Whine: Two children. Six weeks. Five ear infections. Eighty doses of antibiotics. One bottle of kiddie Motrin. One bottle of something else. . . . (I mean Sprite, for goodness sake. What kind of mother do you think I am?)

Cheese: SPRING! It’s here. In Texas, these are the BEST DAYS ALL YEAR. I had almost forgotten there was a whole ‘nother world out there. Filled with non-television-ways to entertain my children. Too bad it’ll be over by May 1st and we’ll have to head back inside lest we all melt directly into the sidewalk. But that’s ok, because today IT’S SPRING. Which is why I took my kids to the movies and sat inside today.

 

As a SAHM (isn’t that a sassy way to say stay-at-home-mom? I don’t really think so either, I’m just too lazy to type it out) I often get asked The Question. It used to bother me when someone asked me. Mostly because I would look back on my day and have absolutely nothing to show for it. I’d have no idea where those twelve hours of my life had gone. It both confused and terrified me to wonder what had happened to that day in my life. But, alas, after doing this for almost four years, I have found my answer. If someone asked me today, I think the conversation would go something like this:

 

Innocent Questioner: (trying very hard not to offend but still very curious) So, what is it exactly that you DO all day?

 

Me: We go to the doctor.

 

IQ: No, really. I mean, I think I’d just go crazy being at home all day.

 

Me: Yeah, me, too. Good thing I’m never at home and I’m always AT THE DOCTOR.

Or on the way to the doctor. Or on the way from the doctor to the pharmacy. Or sitting up in the middle of the night taking someone’s temperature and wondering how early I can call the doctor. Or sitting at home within arm’s reach of my phone waiting for the doctor to call to tell me when I can come in and see the doctor.

 

IQ: (looking baffled and not sure s/he believes me) Oh.

 

I’ve been told (and I’m sure this is correct) that this stage, too, will pass. I’m sure it will. Only to be succeeded by the  drive-them-to-school-and-sports-and-music-practice-and-the-orthodontist-and-because-they-forgot-their-lunch phase. Where are we on developing those alternate fuels, anyway? I’m going to be broke.

But don’t worry, I hear that they eventually get their own drivers’ lisences. Then they drive themselves places. (Still on your dime, of course). But at least then we can finally sit at home and enter the oh-my-gosh-she-hasn’t-called-where-is-she-is-she-in-a-ditch phase, which I’ve heard is the phase that actually never ends, even when they’re 65. 

This mothering gig is never going to end, is it? Oh well, at least I have good benefits:

Show Me Those Baby Blues

Show Me Those Baby Blues

 

You Too With the Baby Blues?

You Too With the Baby Blues?

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7 Responses to “At Least I’ve Got Good Benefits”

  1. Rosie April 2, 2009 at 7:38 pm #

    Let me tell when it ends………never. They multiply. I just got home from staying w/3 grandsons for a couple of hours. Now I worry about Daughter, son-in-love, their 3 boys, Son, daughter-in-love, their toddler… are they okay? are they happy? are my babies going to be okay in this crazy world, will my kids be okay raising their kids? did they mommies hear back from the doctor? are the daddies’ jobs secure? Oh my, I am tired…I will go rest…oh yea, I can do that and not be woken up by a cry, spilled glass of milk, a fight, oh…I miss those days…NOT! Hang in their Mommies and Daddies.
    Love, Hayden, Nolan, Evan and Cooper’s MiMi

  2. Kelly April 3, 2009 at 8:19 am #

    Those are some awesome benefits! BTW, we all know you don’t pay for your gas 🙂 Nice sympathy plow though.

  3. Kelly April 3, 2009 at 8:20 am #

    Ploy, not plow. Sorry.

  4. Aunt Linnaea April 3, 2009 at 8:45 am #

    Ahh, those wonderful benefits! I am still reaping them, and Mike just turned 31. It is such a joy to watch the adult “kids” in action, especially when they are together. Like you, I muddled thru when they were children, & did the best I could. Somehow God blesses our efforts, and in the process demonstrates His Abba heart toward us. 🙂

  5. rachelle April 3, 2009 at 9:18 am #

    you definitely need a raise!

  6. wee April 5, 2009 at 10:02 pm #

    Wonderfully Nice post! You bring me joy! 8) THANK YOU from my heart to yours.

  7. michelle April 8, 2009 at 1:48 pm #

    so with you on the dr. bit. This is the longest stretch of someone being sick free since we brought Tess home from the hospital….and we are only at day 4!
    feel for your babies w/ ear infections. I had a double one last weekend and it was worse than the flu!

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